- I’m still a bit shaken up. I was involved in quite a violent mugging the other day. But on the plus side, I did make a few quid.
- I’ve got two kids, Jane and Emma. Sadly they do both get bullied at school. I can’t make it stop, but I can help them rise above it. So the other day I sat them down and said, “Look boys …”
- The Archbishop of Canterbury recently said that he couldn’t support gay marriage without first having a mandate. Honestly, if he’s that bothered, I’ll go out with him.
- I bought a really nice 12-year-old Scotch. I mean, obviously his parents weren’t pleased.
- This morning I made a Belgian waffle. In the afternoon I made a Frenchman talk bollocks.
